Wow, I can’t believe it’s been 2 weeks since my last post. I’m sorry for not posting earlier. I’ve been quite busy with a variety of projects. I’m planning to post them on my other website soon. Anyhow, I hope you are all doing well. 🙂
Coincidentally, the last post I wrote was the day I met with Dr. F to discuss our options. Prior to our meeting, here are the options I thought we had:
1 – Do another FET, which FYI, insurance does not cover. It’s an out-of-pocket expense that costs $4,000.
2 – Do another IVF cycle, which I estimated would cost another $3,000+.
and 3 – Nothing. Take a break from all the medication and wait.
In my last post I mentioned that I was done and I didn’t want to continue trying anymore. I felt that way because I was so hurt and the process is time consuming. I recognized that a break was necessary but I didn’t want to take it. Honestly, I wanted to do another FET but I knew what I needed to do…option 3…Nothing, at least for a little while. Choosing to do another FET right away would have been more draining. I knew my body needed to rest from all the medications and the emotional stress I experienced.
Doing another FET seemed to be only option but the price was not inviting. Plus, money is always considered, whether or not I’m working outside my home. I knew that we could afford to do another FET but I really had to think about whether that would be a smart decision. I thought about the options we had and was still usure of what to do. My husband & I discussed the options and decided we would wait until next year, 2013 to do anything, whatever it would be. Of course, our decision also depended on Dr. F. recommendations.
The night before the meeting I wrote a couple of questions in my phone so I wouldn’t forget to ask them. I really didn’t know what the objective of the meeting was and I didn’t know what to expect. I figured we would discuss the FET and options, obviously, but other than that I didn’t know.
The day arrived for my follow up appointment with Dr. F. I went by myself because my husband had a work meeting and was unable to attend. When I arrived, they were apparently busy. I knew I would be waiting a little longer than usual. It wasn’t a problem because they have a TV and I have my phone to do shopkicks on. When ready, Dr. F. and I walked to his office. He shut the door and then talked with me while looking through my folder. He allowed time for me to ask questions. I only had 2. The first questions was in regard to my endometriosis and if I should consider removing it. I don’t remember the entire answer but I remember him explaining that removing it would be helpful if I experience a lot of pain. I remember thinking that I do but I didn’t say anything. I just thought about it. The second question I had was about my menses. I wanted to know why I didn’t get it prior to the blood test results. Dr. F explained that during a normal menstrual cycle, a drop in progesterone levels would initiate my menses. So, because I was still taking the progesterone I didn’t get a period until after I stopped the medication. I was like, “Oh!” After that I felt dumb because I felt like I should know that. Lol. After answering all my questions, we carried on with our discussion.
Dr. F. apologized for us not having any success. I didn’t know what to say. I felt he was genuine and I played it off by telling him, “it’s ok.” That was awkward for me. It wasn’t ok but I knew we both recognized that success was important. Instead of dwelling on the lack of success, Dr. F focused on the embryos.
Dr. F used an analogy that helped me understand his perspective in the process, including our options. I’ll call it…The Olympics. He showed me pictures of our remaining 5 embryos and compared them to the olympics. Seeing the embryos renewed my strength, hope, and purpose. I completely understood the analogy and was again reminded of the risks involved with every step. To make it to the freezing, each of the embryos are really good. They’re the best athletes! When it comes to the day of competition, you hope for an elite performance but never truly know how they will perform. I may have exaggerated a little more than Dr. F, but you get the point right? Dr. F. explained that he would expect 3-4 babies from the 7 embryos we originally had and with the 5 left, he still has that same expectation. I know each embryo must meet a specific criteria so it was intriguing to me that the same expectation applies to the 5 remaining embryos. Pretty cool actually!
We continued our meeting by discussion our options. I was pretty accurate in my guesses for options. Dr. F reviewed all the options, including the ones I thought about. Dr. F, he’s so nice. One more than one occasion, he’s told me I’m young. Lol. Sometimes I don’t feel young when I think of trying to have my first child at thirty-something. But I am young! 🙂 Just a little note here…if the Dr. tells you you’re young, soak it up! Lol. Anyways! Here’s a brief description of what we talked about:
1) FET. Cost: $4,000 Begin: whenever we want. This option is always available as long as we have frozen embryos…and we pay the storage fee. Ya, I know, it reminds me of the all the storage facilities that have popped up on Oahu over the past 5+ years. Except my embryos require much less space. Lol.
2) IVF. If we switched insurance companies we would get another “free” try. Dr. F office would not charge us a copay for this second cycle. Not sure if you remember but the copay price begins at $3,000.
3) Natural cycle with a little medicine. I was not expecting this to be an option. I told Dr. F that we weren’t planning to start anything until next year, end of January at the earliest. He was respectful of that, which I really appreciated. Now that I think about it, I don’t think we talked about how much this option would be. I’m assuming that it is much cheaper than the other options. I’m guess it’s like an IUI, which is a few hundred dollars. Dr. F requested to do an ultrasound after we finished our discussion. He wanted to see what the lining of my uterus looked like without medication, during a regular cycle.
Our meeting was done. We walked out of Dr. F office and into an exam room. I had a few minutes to change before he and my IVF coordinator knocked and came in. During the exam, Dr. F inspected my uterus and remarked that it looked good. What a relief! I was hoping it would look ok. I was so enthralled that Dr. F could tell I ovulated by the looking at my uterus. It was amazing to me. Dr. F wanted to see the lining of my uterus at different times during a normal cycle. So, I have to call to schedule a day 10-12 exam. Looks like the natural cycle is an option for now. Yeah!
Well, those are our options. I feel good and comfortable with them. Another good thing is that I didn’t feel pressured from anyone to do anything. The decisions were and are completely ours. You know, after the FET was not successful, in some ways I felt like our options were limited to FET or IVF. I’m glad that I had the opportunity to meet with Dr. F.
Still not sure what option we’ll choose. We’ll see.
Next post: Considering the Options